the moon tonight...words fail to describe it. i was suddenly reminded why i miss living on a farm. away from the sounds and lights of a city. instead, having the sounds of nothing...or an occasional coyote howling. summer is going to be awesome, we'll be able to sit outside, smoke, and stay warm. i realize how nostalgic i really am. i miss getting woken up to the sound or smell of breakfast being made or having to wake up at 5 in the fucking morning to milk cows with my father. i miss waking up in t middle of the night to go and take a piss outside (there is something poetic about pissing at night with no one around, it's hard to explain to anyone) all that now...is gone, i forgot most of the good memories of the farm and my father and replaced them with utter hate. but, i guess, life always has its ups and downs. i hate this reflecting shit, i guess i am "emo" but hey, at least i, unlike most emo kids, never had a relationship in highschool to write about...i just had awkwardness and heavy metal...haha.
well, i must go to bed, i get to watch a confidentiality training video at work tomorrow...i do get paid for it at least.
so, night everyone
trav

alright, after one of those random epiphanies (i rarely have them anymore) and a moment of clarity (nice weather) i thought for once, about going back into nursing, and then pursuing my doctorate, why?
a.)i've always wanted to do a career in which i help people and make enough money
b.)ever since i was little, i wanted to become a vet and/or doctor
after going through some medical records and just reading the history and physicals and diagnoses on numerous patients and realizing, my god, this shit makes sense to me (i went to nursing school for a semester and all this stuff sticks in my head, i just need a refresher). i'm going to research this one and see what i have to do. med school? later on, i plan on doing the whole nursing thing for a while just so i can catch up on bills. i realize that i might have to do things that scare (see old people naked) but as long as they are getting the help and support that they need, fuck yeah. i already work at a hospital, they might help me out on this one, cool wit me. but for now, i'm going to play some halo 2 and enjoy the perks of having xbox live.
love you all
my roommates rock
shaun-you're overbearing and a controlling prick, but i need it
john-you compensate for my feminine side
matt-you've earned your way into the honorary brother title
nolan-your geekiness and meekness warms all of our hearts
liz-you're the only one that scares me-but you always keep things alive around here
signing off...

so yeah, i'm taking a semester off, i'm so sick of having to deal with money and smiley faced financial aid officers who just want to "help you" into a nervous breakdown. i need something else, and i need to figure out what i want to do with my life, whether it be film school or even law school, i just need something i'll enjoy, ya know? this is what happens when you don't decide, 3 and a half years of school and i have nothing to show for it except a big debt and a big wealth of ...nothing. i need out.

after working at a popular electronics store, i've learned that

1.)if people want a ps2/xbox/nintendo ds NOW, and if they don't get it they throw wrestling games at cd racks
2.)old people are obsessed with Josh Groban and Daniel O'Donnel, Benny Goodman has been replaced by an obviously gay kid and a religious zealot...
3.)i'm horribly behind the times (e.g. who the hell is lil jon and what is crunk?)
4.)people with good music taste are few, but will always stop and chit chat with you, this makes me happy, Tom Waits couple-you guys rule
5.)impatient people are funny, they have no consideration for your own personal needs (a couple waited for me to come out of the bathroom...)
6.)people in general, are terrified of computers, gaming systems, tv's, and anything else that requires the intelligence of a monkey
7.)all the managers have yet to refer to me as Trav...it's always Hey, or Hey you, they'll take the time to do the awkward back pat but won't remember your name, damn.
8.)the security guys don't like it when you tell them they have a "trust issue"
9.)the highest shoplifted cd's-rap and latina-the lowest-wang chung
10.)that people wearing nascar clothes ask for two things-blue collar comedy tour and the Dale Earnhardt movie...no buddy, get it done you stupid fucking, inbred, sheep fucking, cousing raping, pickup driving, minority hating, sack of shit.

i hate this state, but we have mt. rushmore...

moved in, relaxed, productive...somewhat. ok after weeks and weeks of planning, we're in, this is good, very good. working like a dog, not having much a chance to listen to music and watch movies, but...i'll manage. i have nothing to say.